Positive Discipline For Teenagers - Learn to Forgive Your Teen

• Don't Be Too Fast to Judge
  
  A good number of parents have done this and you possibly will do it too. Occasionally we feel that our children simply do not listen to us. It seems like we can tell them not to do a specific thing literally dozens of times and yet they still do it. Then one time our teen repeats this behavior (for case in point let's use not calling us to say they may come home late) and we clearly sort of "lose it" and "explode" on them.
  
  Afterward we discover they in fact tried their best to call us and there was a real explanation why we did not receive their call despite their effort to do so. At that moment we feel terrible about the manner in which we initially responded. We had jumped to a conclusion and judged them completely based on prior experience. In this instance we were mistaken. It's not a happy place to be as a parent. So we should try not to be so fast to form an opinion until we have all of the details.
  
  

• Calm Yourself Before You Act
  
  Many times, parents react in the extreme to what they see as their teenager repeatedly defying them. Let's use the case in point above of the phone call you never received saying your teenager would be late. Your emotions can quickly overcome you. You may possibly have been feeling scared not knowing where they were. Are they okay? When they finally return home your anxiety possibly will turnnger. Sooner then you even realize what is happening you are screaming at your son or daughter asking why they did not call and you get so caught up in that instant you never really stop long enough for them to respond.
  
  The best thing to do in this kind of setting is to give your teen a hug, tell them you are glad they are safely back home and that you would like to have a conversation with them later. After that simply walk away from the situation. I know it can be very difficult to do this! Walking away will provide you time to gather your thoughts. You might even want to write down what you are feeling and what you want to say to them. Later that day (or the following morning if the episode occurred at night) have a discussion with your teen.
  
  You should inform them that when they do not call after you have told them to you begin to worry something is wrong. Of course, you should also pay attention to your teenager and find out if there really was some reason that prevented them from calling. If you find that was the case you two can create a solution to handle that issue in the future.
  
  

• Accept That Your Teenager Will Make Mistakes
  
  Your teenager will make mistakes. It's fact! Making mistakes, and many of them, is a natural part of growing up. As a parent, I feel one of the most valuable things you can do is to help your teenager to gain knowledge from from their mistakes. Talk about the mistake they made. Not in a critical way to illustrate to them how incorrect they were.
  
  Your purpose should be for the two of you to create a solution to the problem. Help them to understand why it "is such a big deal" and after that let them offer ideas on how they may possibly prevent the same issue from occurring again in the future. Pay attention to what they tell you and offer your own solutions. Create a solution that works for them and makes you feel comfortable.